At any rate, Smiths stilted acting is the only genuinely sour note in a symphony of acceptably mediocre hackery: Zwarts direction is flat but functional, and the story would be perfectly acceptable given the generally-limited scope of the sports movie, if thirty minutes could be trimmed out (and they could, very easily).Henson Screenplay: Christopher Murphey Release: June 10, 2010 Director: Harald Zwart Genre: Action, Adventure, Drama, Family Stream Now.
But that is exactly the running time of the new remake of The Karate Kid, which finds Will and Jada Pinkett Smith winning the Best Parents of the Year award, having bought their son Jaden his very own blockbuster movie to star in, with which he can show off his awesome kung fu skills to the whole world. Im not going to launch into some huffy thing about how its a damn pity that the film was insta-cast with a Hollywood scion, neatly skipping past that messy audition process that occasionally results in a talented, non-famous person getting a part in a movie; my strong suspicion is that the tail wagged the dog on this one, and that the alternative to Jaden Smiths The Karate Kid would be the non-existence of The Karate Kid. ![]() Still, the worst that can be said about the film is that its incredibly perfunctory and lacks the remotest hint of sparkle; and thats actually enough to put it a bit ahead of the pack in this, the most grotesque movie summer in memory (its also enough to make it arguably the best English-language project from director Harald Zwart, whose previous titles include Agent Cody Banks, The Pink Panther 2, and most pleasingly, a Norwegian film called Long Flat Balls. And its sequel ). Unlike far too many American movies aimed at a family audience, nothing about it seems actively harmful to children, though nothing about it terribly inspiring, either. Its just a big old wad of disposable nothing that, if not for its hideously indulgent length, would be almost restfully bland. So, theres this kid, Dre Parker (Smith), who is being dragged to China against his will by his widowed mother (Taraji P. Henson, putting far more energy and vitality into her performance than the barbarically simple role - little more than alternatively glowering and beatific reacion shots - demands, or rewards; but she is accordingly the best element of the film, no contest), who has to go there for ill-explained business reasons, but I guess since were following Dres perspective, business reasons is all we need. In China, Dre is mopey and sad, until he meets a pretty violin student, Meiying (Han Wenwen), and then promptly gets his ass kicked by her protective not-boyfriend, Cheng (Wang Zhenwei). This attracts the attention of local handyman Mr. Han (Jackie Chan), who instructs young Dre in the fine art of kung fu, and begins prepping the boy to compete in the upcoming tournament. What happens next surprises nobody, except for the characters in the movie. Aside from the title - whose wrongness is underscored by a moment in the film when Dres mom huffs about kung fu and karate being the same thing, in a way clearly meant to point out her ignorance - the biggest problem with The Karate Kid 10 is its lack of pointedness. Far too much of the narrative, especially in the agonising first half, before Dre even starts to practice the martial arts, is full of little go-nowhere details and reiteration of plot points we already understand (perhaps just to make certain that we understand that Cheng is a bully, the movie obligingly gives us the same exact beat up on Dre scene at least three times), and it drags like hell. Zwart, unsurprisingly, doesnt have the chops to move the thing along with any kind of urgency (hes no John G. Avildsen, thats for sure, and Christ does it hurt to have to pay any kind of compliment to John G. Avildsen), and his job is not helped out even slightly by his two leads: Chan, whos never looked so old, underplays his part with some success - the customary Jackie Chan tomfoolery would have been disastrous here - though he doesnt save the movie from being a bit sleepy. It wouldnt really matter, though, since the bulk of the movie rests on Jaden Smiths shoulders, and bless him, but he cant act. I dont want to be pointlessly mean about an eleven-year-old, but he couldnt act in The Day the Earth Stood Still, and he cant act here, and hes not even really trying from what I can tell. Im sure his parents love him, and they didnt mean to hog all the talent in the family. But he has no more charisma nor native talent than any random pre-teen boy that you could pluck off of any street in the country. His line deliveries are uniformly wooden, and his every expression is the same look of stiff indifference. ![]() If life was fair, I probably would have some tiny measure of guilt for saying this eleven-year-old actor sucks, and he sucks hard, and yet I do not.
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